Ch00bakka's Marginalia

The following notes are scrawled in the margins of a book of dirty poetry that got its writer, an otherwise well-regarded philosopher, exiled from his city. They have nothing to do with the text itself, which will not be replicated here on account of its profanity and immorality. Each appears to be commentary on another work in the Library, as though written by the author, though the works are by different writers scattered across worlds and centuries. Some have not yet been written. Some never will be.

• Holian's Heretical Hagiographies, Chapter 12: Milksaint Carvery. A hagiography from a lost future, the life of a revolutionary martyr on a colony-ship bound for a new Earth. Commentary by the second-greatest heresiologist in all history, Drenchat Egarszoon Holian, unfortunately unedited due to the premature birth of his grandson. Written mostly by hand on a legal pad that I think I still have somewhere, in a variety of bars and coffee shops. Lame to go to the bar and write? Maybe. I read an earlier, unfootnoted version on Misery Loves Company, a weekly reading series put on by the online literary journal Misery Tourism; the video is available here.
  WORDS: 1700. FOOTNOTES: 28. PORTMANTEAUX: Too many to count.
• Fight Report: Coober Pedy Cave Clash 100. Another fantastic bit of sportswriting from everyone's favorite horrible lesbian gonzo journalist, Sofia Haugen — her first appearance on the Wanderer's Library, and her second appearance in Australia. This one's in the Titanclash LIVE canon, and features a kaiju deathmatch between a teleporting koala and a horned lizard. Big fan of Titanclash, glad I finally got around to writing something for it. More Sofia to come? I hope so.
  WORDS: 3400. FOOTNOTES: 21. LESBIANS: 5.¹
• Duke 'till Dusk. A yuletide gift for Snapdragon133. Duke Gathers, gonzo chameleon, makes a trip to the dying world of Last Light to embed with local law enforcement in their hunt for a serial killer. My second piece of gonzo journalism in a Serpentine Sorting System canon. I guess Vitalis should be next. I hope everyone appreciates Captain Adeniel's smallcaps, it took so fucking long to do, it was so tedious, I don't know that it was worth it. This article is also sort of an extended riff on classic SCP self-insert tale Duke 'till Dawn.
  WORDS: 6969 (nice). CLOACAS: 4. RULES OF JOURNALISM: 12.

+Translations

Footnotes

1. Sofia; her late aunt; her late aunt's late "roommate" Susan; Sheila Satori (non-practicing); Lucy. Further lesbians are implied by the existence of Kemonomimi Zaibatsu and Wormwood Princess Apocalypse: Burning Desert Sado-Motocross, but do not make an appearance in the story. Brenda the car and Decapitatrix the giant lizard are both heterosexual. Sofia's ex-wife Asphyxia is bi.