I should read more things twice because thee first time I read this I didn't get itt but now I very much undrstand both the metaphor and the themeing! And it hurts! it hurts so bad! Im in school and working and sometimes I just want to take that godamn leap.

But, we shall see.

Thank you Styg.

-Avalon

-Styg

Particularly striking was the idea of the swing extending far into the sky, gravity saying the one on the swing should logically fall, but they don’t. +1

-Styg

Overall, yeah, it's a pretty good article. +1

Also, congrats on the program~

-Styg

congratulations on getting into your master's program.

- Yes, I do not like my own entry
- I agree, I think it is not enjoyable on its own merits

Self-imposed restrictions which hindered the development of this work:

- I didn't want it to be too much like With Rigging of Gold and a Sky Like Wine
- I didn't want to make it any longer lest people be turned off from the length
- The swingset was required for this work, and so was the theme. Neither concept was picked at random

Story elements, particularly the message, per the discussion we had:

The "reveal" being so early was intentional — if I had left it to the last minute, the reader would have felt cheated, and I would not have been able to do as much discussion of insecurity and anxiety as I did, lest the reader cotton on too soon and feel bored by the reveal. So, the compromise: a short work with the reveal early, and then going beyond the point where the thought process/downward spiral usually ends to give an uplifting, encouraging message. It's not great, but it works. The other reviewers specifically asked me to keep those elements — I feel conflicted, given our talk, but weary and thrashed enough to give up. The work is done. The contest has begun. And so I post.

No bad air between us though — all is well. Just thought I might give you some context for the changes.

I saute thee with salt and vinegar like brussels sprouts. :)

-Styg