In the Native creation stories that I have read, the brothers usually quarrel and fight (kind of like Cain and Abel), acting as symbols of good and bad, or id and ego; they are clearly both gods and men – i.e., they are born, can create and shape life; and when one “kills” the other it is clear that it’s not really death. Generally they don’t have any problem shaping the land and creating trees, birds, etc. as desired. Also, I’m not familiar with any indigenous cultures that would use terms like “Industry” and “Foresight.”

So not a total ripoff.

Kidding (it is folklore after all), but this story isn't quite good enough for an upvote. It's not bad, though agreeing with the above comment that the phrasing makes it confusing. It's obvious Foresight dies when you think about it for a bit, but you have to pull yourself out of the story and reread to do so. If the obfuscation is intentional, it's not a good idea because it's obvious anyway. If the obfuscation is unintentional, it's not a good idea because it's confusing to read. Fix.

Still, I like that it's two brothers and one volunteers to die for the good of mankind; a nice twist on the ole Cain and Able "first murder" thing.

First off, "vital fluid" just seems like a bit of an awkward phrasing for folklore. Try to find a better way of phrasing it. Second, the flow of the story makes it a little hard to figure out which brother died. It's Foresight, yes, but you could make that a bit more clear.

I'm unsure on the name "Industry." Just doesn't sit right with me. But that's more personal preference. Yoric seems to like the name.