The rhythm of the poem could be better; I feel like some lines have too many syllables, while others have too little. Try reading the poem aloud and see if you can read it comfortably. If you can say it without forcing any of the lines to rhyme/match up, and you don't find yourself running out of breath, I think it would be better.
I don't have anything wrong with the basis of the story, but perhaps it would also be interesting to have some connection between the poems.
You can also check out my guide to poetry.