The footnotes were an interesting part, as were the lines and stage directions (which I assume they are). Regarding the verse section, I like the rhythm of it, but the second stanza should flow better with a minor word change in the last four lines to even the beat out. Perhaps add another footnote in the third stanza, for more detail and to explain its meaning, or even consider adding another stanza to give more content to the verse. Another stanza would also help smooth out the general mood and theme of the verse part.
Besides that, character tags for the lines (like in a modern play script) might be interesting. They should prob be in gibberish to follow the "scrap of theatre" feel. I think it'd work if you either used special characters, or just weird characters:
£*$^^! : I like ice cream
Nice work, I am excited to see what you have planned in the future from the Things You Find page. Feel free to use the forums if you ever need review/writing help !
