Current Prompt Entry

Summary:

Just looking for any last minute advice or ideas.

Current Prompt Entry

Tesrec Ameginn 06 Nov 2015 18:11

Hello! I was wondering if anyone had any last minute ideas or advice for my current prompt entry, which can be found under the tab "Current Prompt Work" here: http://wanderers-sandbox.wikidot.com/tesrec-s-corner . If so, I very much appreciate it!

Re: Current Prompt Entry

rumetzen 08 Nov 2015 08:53

I'm about to go to sleep, but I'll get to it when I wake up.

Re: Current Prompt Entry

Tesrec Ameginn 09 Nov 2015 15:30

Sorry if I'm being annoying, but did you ever get to read it?

Re: Current Prompt Entry

(account deleted) 09 Nov 2015 18:12

The first paragraph should be broken up to make it easier to read. Also, it conveys about three different ideas, so yeah, break it up.

Going to go with the same advice I gave last time: expand this. It's an okay start, but it's basically just "we're underground now and don't want to be." Given that this is basically the a hyper-summarized/less-interesting version of the plot to Undertale, there needs to be something more here. There are plenty of directions that you can go with this.

Re: Current Prompt Entry

Bryx 09 Nov 2015 18:24

I'd be more interested to learn what happens when they get back to their city. It sounds like they've evolved to be far more suited to underground life. Could they even live in the sunlight world above? Was it everything they'd hoped, or was the tale exaggerated down through the years?

Re: Current Prompt Entry

Tesrec Ameginn 09 Nov 2015 20:39

Ok, thanks for your input so far. I'll start re-working it with your advice in mind and post again on here when it's ready for another review. Thank you all so much!