Hello 
AnnieTheRed, and welcome to the Library!
I'm Avelon, and I took a look at your story to give a review. Firstly, I like the music! Did you make it yourself? As a composing musician myself, I think it really fits well with the theme of the story so far, so I only have a small consideration. I'm not very familiar with drone music so I don't know what the conventions are, but it might be interesting if the percussion faded out with the rest of the track instead of taceting completely at around 1:05. It does not matter as far as the piece's effectiveness goes, I love it the way it is and am just curious as to what you'd say about it.
Anyway, as far as the writing, I like what you have so far, but I feel like this is more of just an intro to at least one or two more scenes of what this traveling celestial being will do. The setup is really good at setting the tone and characterizing the narrator. This paragraph…
Lest my claims of destruction seem grandiose…
…is a little bit wordy and reads a little awkwardly, but I do understand what it means. Consider rewording or making it more concise.
May I ask what this traveler means to do? Also, I am unsure of how the title connects to the story as of right now (I have a rough idea, but again, it seems like this story feels incomplete); what do you have planned? Keep up the good work, let me know what you think about all of this and if you would consider expanding the story to add more depth to the conflict of the narrator and build the plot more to make this memorable.
(account deleted)