Crit Request: Pann tes Relil's Bestiary

Summary:

Got a gallery for your lil' peepers to review.

Crit Request: Pann tes Relil's Bestiary

Doctor Pann 28 Dec 2021 06:50

http://wanderers-sandbox.wikidot.com/doctor-pann

Your brightness should be pretty high to look at this one since one of the images is admittedly rather dim.

Any kind of crit is appreciated, including on the images. Admittedly, I'm not entirely sure how much I can change the images, but I guess I can take suggestions for the future? Idk. SPaG would be appreciated if needed, since I had to shut off grammarly with all of the fake words I've been using. Otherwise, yeah! Thanks!

(This is meant to be a gallery page btw if u didn't get that) :)

Last edited on 28 Dec 2021 06:54 by Doctor Pann Show more

Re: Crit Request: Pann tes Relil's Bestiary

UncertaintyCrossing 28 Dec 2021 07:32

Let's GO another gallery page!!

Overall, this is really fun! The voice is really strong throughout, and I love the personality that shines through. I'm a sucker for art pages that are integrated into the world they're about, and this definitely does that quite well!

As you mentioned, the art of the frog is a little dark/has low contrast, but it's still viewable (for me at least) on desktop and mobile at my usual brightness settings, so I think all should be good.

For formatting, I might consider putting some form of divider or line-break between each of the creatures+description blocks, but I don't think it's that necessary/if it doesn't look good then don't include it.

Finally I've included a few SPaG things in the collapsible below, but overall I really enjoy this and can't wait to see it posted!

SPaG

the fact that you couldn't recognize initially read these words is surprising.

the fact you couldn't initially recognize or read these words is surprising

or creations of ourse we are excessively proud of

ours

Fernris beings as Fernris bei gs can still have metaphysical animus.

beings

Unfortunately, the frogs sent verions of themselves

versions

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But the time flies, irretrievable.