For You, The World / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page For You, The World.

first post oh wow?

Voidless_7 23 Sep 2022 16:55

i forgot to make one of these after posting so here i am;

admittedly i wasn't very inspired by the image given to me, ( Here )and altered it a little for color changes. i did rush a little through the writing but i hope it isn't too confusing- i plan to continue this as a little series so if anything doesn't make sense now, it should clear up later.

special thanks to my close friends and a couple strangers (who don't have accounts here afaik) for reading through my drafts and calling out my pitfalls ^^

Maxyfran73 24 Sep 2022 06:10

This is so weird but I really dig the style. At the beginning it feel like a Backrooms sort of deal, but then the texts begin making things clearer without really explaining anything, and then we fall and we keep going, and we change perspectives and god this is actually really good.

It feels rushed but like, in a good way, and the bits like the collapsible and the 'why' at the end feel so powerful in their brevity. I love the surreal-ness to this all.

An amazing piece, even if I don't fully get what's going on here. +1

Jackyfudge 26 Sep 2022 04:16

I can't really describe my thoughts on this. The picture being there doesn't make sense and yet it does. Confusing in a way that isn't confusing. Feels like dissociation. Any way really good +1

Rounderhouse 28 Sep 2022 19:11

I'm admittedly a bit torn on this. I really like the prose — it's clean, evocative, well-written. It serves as a great mood setter for the piece and glues the journal entries together excellently — and there's the downer. I really wasn't a fan of the journal entries. They improved as time went on — the first two are by far the most difficult to get through — but the rest are still awkward and stilted, jarringly so when contrasted against the prose. It feels off, and not in a good way. Which is a shame, since that's where most of the meat of the story is. But since the prose is quite good and since I enjoyed the ending so much (well done on that; very strong), I've resolving to giving it a novote.