Make sure you replace the numbers with the spelled versions unless you’re referring to dates.
…such as the Chinese underworld as a place of torture for sinful souls, or the Egyptian underworld. They all have a different look, making each one extremely unique in its own right, but they all have one thing in common. They are all places of the deceased, they are all places that help us reincarnate into another life.
I would replace the words “Chinese underworld” and “Egyptian underworld” with their correct names and then listing the mythology they come from. (ie. The Duat of Egyptian mythology). Makes your prose flow better along with adding specific details.
When I was 9 years old, it was the first time I heard about “The Afterlife” from my parents when they prayed to their ancestors, and when I asked them what it was, they answered “It is the world of the dead.” I seemed to imagine a world filled with souls in it when I heard the answer from my parents, without knowing that it was more than a place of souls.
I would replace “The afterlife” with something simpler . I also kind of have a hard time understanding the last line, perhaps you can be more precise and use more evocative language besides simply “souls”?
For each person with a different culture, when entering it, there will be perspectives that it is the other world in their mythology. And that is born from the jung Shadow within them.
Shadow should be lowercase while Jung should be capitalise. It shouldn’t be capitalised until you mention what it specifically is in your later paragraph.
There are a couple other problems I’ve noticed, but these were the most glaring to me. I think this word could benefit through a more careful read through when I have more time. It’s a neat idea that needs better execution.
