Dear Joseph / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page Dear Joseph.

NightGoddessNyx 23 Jun 2024 15:02

Wow, can't believe I'm actually posting something! First, I want to thank all of my critters.

This wouldn't be possible (or, at least, any good) without:
MaddGasserGaton
Skipmeister
zipzipskins
TopHatBionicle

A dream inspired this piece, and I just had to write it down. I had originally thought about trying to write this into some SCP article with a heavy stretch of logic, but that same morning I happened to join the Wanderer's Library. The rest is history.

I've loved all of my time here already and I hope to make lots of memories here.

Last edited on 23 Jun 2024 16:33 by NightGoddessNyx Show more

TopHatBionicle 24 Jun 2024 00:54

Happy to have read this. It’s a beautiful and touching piece that tugs violently at the heartstrings!

-THB

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-T.H.B.

FleshMaddAvalon 23 Jun 2024 15:32

GRAHHH I GOT ONE

I INVITED YOU HERE AND YOU POSTED HERE GRAHHH I GOT YOU

lovely piece, so happy to have you here <3

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I watch the yonder hills
See foodwrenches toil in dust
Let their cacophonous calls
Rend our bodies to rust

Snapdragon133 23 Jun 2024 16:47

Aw, I like this piece. It comes and shows us an emotional moment and leaves again, and I appreciate that. +1

zipzipskins 24 Jun 2024 01:15

a short, (bitter)sweet first entry that doesnt overstay its welcome and is happy to live in a very emotional realm. i think that letting the exposition live in the first-person letter really lets us get a swift but memorable glimpse into these characters. clever device and well-written piece. welcome to the library! +1

TrapdoorViolet 29 Jun 2024 01:09

Nyx, I think that overall this is a strong first WL entry from you. Your economy of language creates a clear and precise style that's very appealing.

Despite enjoying your writer's voice, I ended up choosing to no vote this piece for a one very important reason: the letter format didn't work for me. It's for the same reason that Mary Shelley's Frankstein has bothered me—the frame of using a letter just doesn't work to tell the story as it reads a bit stilted and unnatural. Real life letters don't explain life events that the recipient of the letter is already very familiar with. I think an easy and believable switch here would have been for the protagonist to be making a journal entry rather than writing a letter.

I hope that you'll find my critique helpful and if not, of course you can disregard. I just know that it can help to get this kind of feedback as a writer developing their craft.

I will look forward to reading your next offering!

-Vi

Last edited on 29 Jun 2024 01:11 by TrapdoorViolet Show more

Spoddetman 30 Jun 2024 12:29

Short and sweet, with a few minor qualms from me that don't keep me from enjoying and upvoting this. An excellent first piece! I hope to see more from you in the future. :)

Petrichor-scented +1.